I Can't Control You

If we could all understand one fundamental element of relationships, we would find the level of animosity, abrasion and resistance phenomenally reduced. It's simpy this: you can't control someone. Freedom of choice is fundamental to God's design, and each of us is ultimately responsible for our choices. When it comes to disagreements, I know from my own life that you feel so compelled to stick your hands into someone's brain and somehow force them to agree with your point of view. The lesson is to understand that our role in people's lives is not as controllers, but as encouragers. The best we can do is to offer our suggestion on an open platter and hope that someone takes it. And if they don't, there's nothing we can do - it's their choice. This is so true for husbands and wives, and for parents and teenagers. We can only hope to guide somebody towards a good choice, to try and make the choice easier. And that choice is always made easier when we come across with a gentler approach that indicates our respect of their choice, rather than one of manipulation and control.